my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Randomize
