I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
