I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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