I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
