We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Randomize
