yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
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