so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
porn star boner night. come get it.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Randomize
