So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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