What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Randomize
