Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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