He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize