I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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