Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
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