I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Randomize
