CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Randomize