Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
please don't ironically join a cult
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