i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
