a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Randomize
