Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
is it fun? or sober?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
