Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
