Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize