He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
