why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
