when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
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