I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
