I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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