Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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