Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Randomize
