That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
