in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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