Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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