Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize