Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
