Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
