no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
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