OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
