i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Randomize
