yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize
