I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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