Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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