dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
