You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
