There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
There's always time for handjobs
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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