Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
How does it feel to date your dad?
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
