I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize