You work out of a Hotel?
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Randomize
