im having a threesome with these popsicles
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
