just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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