DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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