I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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