do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
