I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
